I hit a huge problem in my fifth part of  the Illustration module. In each previous module (Graphics and Textiles) I had experienced peaks and troughs, lulls and bursts of enthusiasm but this time, I hit the wall. I felt increasingly demotivated and halfway though section 5 I started to really struggle with completing the assignments and exercises.

I went round to my friend’s house for a good moan and complain. Jokingly I said I just didn’t see myself as an illustrator and I was hating the course. This is usually a signal for my friend to encourage me and jolly me along. Next we looked at our personal sketch books and laughed about how they had nothing to do with the course, our OCA sketch books were too boring to look at, these were far more exciting.

Then my friend dropped her bombshell. “Give up” As soon as she said it I knew she was right. I didn’t want to hear those words or even think them. I was fully intending to go onto Level 2 of Visual Communications. So far I have loved the course and have felt I have benefited enormously from following it. I liked being in an academic enviroment with a tutor dispensing criticism and praise, but this level of demotivation was impossible to ignore or explain away as a bad day / week.

After a gap of around 3 months I managed to struggle through the remaining exercises and Assignment 5. Some I quite enjoyed, but it has been like carrying on in a relationship, going through the motions, when you both know it’s over.

Preparing for Assessment

I remember thinking that preparing for assessment after the Graphics module was very useful. I felt I learnt a whole lot of new things, especially redoing exercises after the tutor’s recommendation.

I’m finding a similar thing preparing for Illustration assessment.

This time I have found it easier to be more ruthless, editing sections that I felt weren’t my strongest pieces.

One thing I really noticed in redoing assignments and exercises, was that with the distance of time it was much easier to recognise the flaws of my layouts and how I could improve on my type. I think at the time I would spend some much time creating the imagery it was easy to lose sight of the wood for the trees and become too focussed on just the imagery and how it fitted into the overall context of the brief.

I have found preparing for assessment to be a bit of a slog this time, still struggling with having “hit the wall”, I found the earlier parts easier to have enthusiasm for, I still struggled, all over again with Part 5 and generally I have been disappointed with my overall level of presentation.


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